Discipline; What Does it Mean and What is the Right Way?

Discipline… What exactly does it mean and how are we to do it? Well let’s start with the most popular verse, one that is often misquoted. We have all heard, “Spare the rod; spoil the child” right? Well the correct verse is:

Proverbs 13:24- Whoever spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is diligent to discipline him.

In this article, I will cover what it means to discipline, but before we get started, let’s take a look at what exactly a “rod” is.

The word rod is translated form the Hebrew word “shebet” which is a:

• ROD, staff

• shaft (of spear, dart)

• club (of shepherd' s implement)

• truncheon, scepter (mark of authority)

• clan, tribe

From the definition found in our Bible, we can determine the rod here is either speaking of a shepherd’s tool or a king’s scepter. How do we know which one is being spoken of? The best way to find out is by looking at other verses that have the word rod in it to help us understand how it was used.

Let’s first check out the famous Psalm by David, “Psalm 23:4-Thy ROD and thy staff they comfort me…” This verse begs the question, “If the ROD mentioned in Proverbs is used for discipline, how can it also comfort a person?”

Let’s hear what one writer has to say about it…

“The shebat (ROD) has the meaning of a 'tribe' or a 'scepter'. The primary role of the king was to protect his people. The ROD is symbolic of the power of God in discipline for his own and judgment for others. It is a protection from danger from within and without. A closely related word 'Shabbath' means 'rest', which is possible under the competent protection of the shepherd.

The mishenah or staff has the meaning of support. The Mishnah is a collection of early oral tradition of the Torah and is a support. It is used to draw sheep to the shepherd.

David knew well the meaning and the use of the ROD and the staff, and he did not use the terms redundantly. Unfortunately, many translations mix them up calling a staff a ROD and a ROD a staff.

Addressing the idea that they are one tool, this is unlikely. An animal associates discomfort and pleasure with the object that causes it. If you use a ROD to discipline an animal, it will shy from it, making the tool useless for comforting it. It is important that the two tools are visibly different.

It is more likely that modern shepherds who use only a single tool are often hirelings, and do not build individual trust with the sheep. So they care only for utility, (lengthening the arm) rather than the trust with the animal.”

So it seems here, the rod and the staff had different purposes. The rod is used for discipline and power (authority) but the staff is most likely used for support and guidance. Do we feel these things bring us comfort? It should, because knowing ones boundaries and who protects us, cares for us and is in charge, brings any animal or human being a whole lot of comfort and peace.

Another person writes:

“When I raised livestock I had both a ROD and a staff... the staff is useful in guiding a well-trained animal (that it isn't giving you problems), but it is too light to train an animal that has not yet learned to submit, hence the ROD. The ROD is useful in training the animal to give in to the lighter touch of the staff. (Of course the ROD is also useful for other things, such as defending the animals.)”

Again, the rod is spoken of as a tool for submission and protection, while the staff is described as a tool for guidance.

In this article, Keller lists several purposes for the shorter, heavier ROD:

• As a club or throwing stick to defend against predators.

• For disciplining wayward sheep.

• To assist in examining, marking and counting individuals in the flock.

• Asserting boundaries.

Whereas the staff serves different purposes:

• Rounding up sheep into a flock.

• Guiding sheep by applying pressure to an individual's flank.

• Extricating sheep from bad situations.

On a side note: if you read that list carefully, you will notice it corresponds to the duties of Christ as our shepherd. The rod is the tool He uses to guide us and discipline us, to defend us and mark us as Christ’s own. So what do you think the rod represents? What do we know that does those things? The Word of God and the salvation that comes from hearing it! When the end comes, Christ then uses His staff to pull us from among the wicked and gather us to him where we will reign with Him forever. How cool is that?

With these sources, we can deduct that the “shebet” whether it be a rod or a staff, was used to discipline, defend, inspect, know intimately, create trust, guide and pull someone from a bad situation.

Now, often we hear the word “discipline” and think immediately PUNISHment, but that is not entirely what that means. Discipline in English actually comes from the Latin word “disciplinare” which means to teach. The Hebrew word used in the Bible is musar, which means to chastise, warn, PUNISH, give instruction, correction, and reproof. Musar in turn originates from the word Yacar which additionally means to give doctrine, restrain, and check. Sounds to me a lot like what the disciples, shepherds and Jesus did. Presently we also experience these actions from the Holy spirit. So if we are to be disciples and to be like Christ who was our good shepherd that now dwells in us as the Holy Spirit, then we should look to these definitions and verses as a guide to how we should use the rod to discipline.

Discipline

verb

1. train (someone) to obey rules or a code of behavior, using PUNISHment to correct disobedience.

2. PUNISH or rebuke (someone) formally for an offense.

3. train oneself to do something in a controlled and habitual way.

Since punishment is often included in the definitions, how do we know what kind of PUNISHment is being used or has the term been mistranslated? Below you will see the only verses in the Bible that mention punishment:

Jude 1:7- Just as Sodom and Gomorrah and the surrounding cities, which likewise indulged in sexual immorality and pursued unnatural desire, serve as an example by undergoing a PUNISHment of eternal fire.

2 Thessalonians 1: 9- They will suffer the PUNISHMENT of eternal destruction, away from the presence of the Lord and from the glory of his might,

The word punishment in these verses translate from the Greek word Dike which means justice, judicial hearing, penalty, vengeance, execution of sentence and process of law

Hebrews 10:28- Anyone who has set aside the law of Moses dies without mercy on the evidence of two or three witnesses. How much worse PUNISHment, do you think, will be deserved by the one who has spurned the Son of God, and has profaned the blood of the covenant by which he was sanctified, and has outraged the Spirit of grace? For we know him who said, “Vengeance is mine; I will repay.” And again, “The Lord will judge his people.” It is a fearful thing to fall into the hands of the living God.

The word PUNISH used in this verse comes from the Greek word Timoria which means vengeance or vindication by penalty

Matthew 25:46- And these will go away into eternal PUNISHment, but the righteous into eternal life.”

1 John 4:17- By this, love is perfected with us, so that we may have confidence in the day of judgment; because as He is, so also are we in this world.18 There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves punishment, and the one who fears is not perfected in love. 19We love, because He first loved us

The word punishment in these verses was translated from the Greek word “kolasis” which means: chastisement, correction and torment (possibly with the idea of deprivation). What’s very interesting here, is that punishment involves “fear” and the person who fears is not perfected in love. What is this fear being spoken of and what is the punishment? It is the fear of punishment which is eternal damnation, but perfect love (which is God sending His own son to die for our sins) casts out all fear.

Proverbs 11:21- Be assured, an evil person will not go unPUNISHed, but the offspring of the righteous will be delivered.

Jeremiah 25:29- For behold, I begin to work disaster at the city that is called by my name, and shall you go unPUNISHed? You shall not go unPUNISHed, for I am summoning a sword against all the inhabitants of the earth, declares the Lord of hosts.’

The Hebrew word used here for unpunished is “naqah” which means: innocent, purged, without guilt, free, innocent.

So, we can conclude that the term punishment is a legal term that includes serving a sentence or paying a penalty as a sort of vindication or vengeance for our behaviors. Now let’s think about this for a second; did the shepherds dole out sentences when the sheep were bad? Did they pay penalties? Do children serve time for their crimes? Do we punish them by vindication or vengeance? No. What is also very interesting, the word punishment in these verses is only reserved for God’s vengeance against the wicked (unsaved). The wicked are those who are not his children and called by his name. If we are to be as Christ, then I think it would be safe to say punishment is not a term included in the discipline of our children.

Additionally, take note that the Law of Moses was a system of legal rules and included penalties or PUNISHMENTS for breaking them. The bible says that the Law of Moses is meant to bring sinners (or the wicked) to Christ, but when they come to Christ they are under the Law of Christ. From that point on we are His children. He then guides and teaches us how to live according to God’s Word by the Holy spirit who gives us grace and wisdom. No longer do we pay penalties. No longer are we punished. No longer are we marked out for vindication and vengeance. Instead, we become His beloved children whom he lovingly teaches, rebukes, disciplines and guides with grace and mercy. If we are to be like our Lord and Savior, then maybe this is something to consider…

Below are some verses that show God disciplines those whom he loves and calls His children and take notice the word punishment is never used:

Hebrews 12:5- “My son, do not despise the chastening of the LORD,

Nor be discouraged when you are rebuked by Him;

6 for whom the LORD loves He chastens,

and afflicts every son whom He receives.”

7 If you endure chastening, God deals with you as with sons; for what son is there whom a father does not chasten? 8 But if you are without chastening, of which all have become partakers, then you are illegitimate and not sons.9 Furthermore, we have had human fathers who corrected us, and we paid them respect. Shall we not much more readily be in subjection to the Father of spirits and live? 10 For they indeed for a few days chastened us as seemed best to them, but He for our profit, that we may be partakers of His holiness. 11 Now no chastening seems to be joyful for the present, but painful; nevertheless, afterward it yields the peaceable fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.

Proverbs 3:11- My son, do not despise the Lord's discipline or be weary of his reproof, for the Lord reproves him whom he loves, as a father the son in whom he delights.

Revelation 3:19- Those whom I love, I reprove and discipline, so be zealous and repent.

Job 5:17- “Behold, blessed is the one whom god reproves; therefore despise not the discipline of the Almighty.

Deuteronomy 8:5- Know then in your heart that, as a man disciplines his son, the Lord your God disciplines you.

So now we know the Lord disciplines those whom he loves. In what way does He discipline us? I can say in my life it has often been just gentle prodding or guidance. Then there are times he may use others to verbally rebuke me or correct me, and times when I am allowed to feel emotional or physical pain from my choices. If that doesn’t work, he will then allow me to suffer major natural consequences, become afflicted by illness or feel a separation from Him. These are methods of discipline that God uses in increasing severity to get our attention. Eventually if we do not heed his warnings, we can end up really hurt or even dead, but ultimately that is our choice and unfortunately some people do not submit to His authority and guidance before it is too late. As parents, we are very much the same way, giving warnings and upping the degree of discipline to get our child to learn and correct their behavior. But when is the discipline too much?

Ephesians 6:4- Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.

I want to make it clear that I am not discouraging or encouraging appropriate spanking, being as God does use physical and emotional pain to teach us, but it would seem to me physical punishment that does not include guidance or teaching would cause a child to become resentful, angry or fearful. I know for me, when I was spanked in a rageful manner without being taught anything, I only remembered the unjust punishment and not what I was supposed to do differently. The verse above gives a solution to making sure your child is not provoked to anger by telling us to bring them up in discipline and instruction of the Lord.

So what is the Lord’s discipline and instruction? Well that is His Holy Word. The Bible. We are to show them right from wrong; we are to instruct them on how to live in a Godly manner. We are to teach them God’s word. Just think, if we were to open up Gods word every time and instruct the child on how to deal with the situation or what the right behavior is supposed to be, how different our children could grow up to be. For the Bible says:

Proverbs 22:6 Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it.

So far it looks like most discipline is along the lines of teaching, rebuke, guidance and separation, but what about those verses that seem to mean a physical punishment with an actual rod? Let’s break them down further;

Proverbs 29:15-The ROD (used for discipline and guidance) and reproof (correction) give wisdom, but a child left to himself brings shame to his mother.

It is more than likely not a physical rod that can give wisdom here, but imagery of a shepherds rods and what it does that can bring wisdom. Of course physical punishment may discourage someone from repeating a behavior, but in some cases it doesn’t. Only animals are guaranteed to refrain from behavior if physically conditioned (Pavlov’s theory), but us humans are smarter than that, some of us will repeat for the sake of preserving our pride or winning a power struggle. Now if we use guidance, teaching and correction, it gives us the best chance at gaining wisdom. Sometimes a physical correction may be necessary, but often times other methods are way more effective especially if there is a lesson to be taught.

Proverbs 23:13- 13 Withhold not correction from the child: for if thou strike him with the rod, he shall not die. 14 Thou shall strike him with the rod, and shall deliver his soul from hell.

Now this verse seems to really seal the deal on the whole physical punishment debate, but let’s take note of the grammar used above.

A colon means "that is to say" or "here's what I mean." When God is saying do not withhold, he is also meaning that by correcting our child, he will not face death and hell. It is not saying if you beat your child with a rod, he most often won’t die from the beatings. It is commanding us to correct our children (hence the use of the word “shall”) and by doing so, we WILL and SHALL deliver his soul from hell…. Wait a minute, I thought only Christ could do that??? Precisely. The verse only confirms that the rod spoken of here is the discipline and instruction of the Lord in Ephesians 6:4. Can a physical punishment with a rod deliver ones soul from hell? No. Only hearing God’s word creates faith in Christ which is the only way to be saved from hell.

Ephesians 2:8-9 For by grace you have been saved through faith.

Romans 10:17- So then faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the word of God.

Given that insight, let’s look at another verse that alludes to a physical punishment:

Proverbs 22:15- Folly is bound up in the heart of a child, but the ROD of discipline drives it far from him.

Once again, take note of the grammar used here… the rod OF discipline. The word “of” is a preposition that creates a relationship between two words. In this verse, the word “of” is particularly used to show possession, as in the ROD possesses discipline. Since we established earlier what discipline meant, we must be able to ascertain that the rod being used can teach and guide, rebuke and chastise. Can a rod on its own do that? No. Can physically using a rod accompanied by those actions drive folly away? Possibly. One thing is for sure, whether the rod is a physical object or a symbol of discipline, it must contain instruction and guidance in order to be effective, and what is the best tool for accomplishing this? God’s words.

None of us like discipline, whether it is physical, verbal or emotional, but what does the bible say happens when we love it and heed it?

Hebrews 12:11- For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.

Proverbs 29:17- Discipline your son, and he will give you rest; he will give delight to your heart.

1 Corinthians 9:27- But I discipline my body and keep it under control, lest after preaching to others I myself should be disqualified.

Proverbs 12:1- Whoever loves discipline loves knowledge, but he who hates reproof is stupid.

Proverbs 13:1- A wise son hears his father's instruction, but a scoffer does not listen to rebuke.

So what do we gain? We gain:

• The peaceful fruit of righteousness

• Wisdom

• Knowledge

• Qualification

• Approval and delight from the hearts of our fathers

What else can cause us to gain those attributes? The Word of God that leads to salvation. Can Physical punishment do that? Not that I can think of, but like I said, if it is accompanied by proper teaching and guidance, then it is possible.

Let’s give a long hard look at how we discipline and the example Christ set to how we should do it. Tonight I want all of us to get on our knees and ask the Holy Spirit to guide us in the way that we should train our children so that they receive wisdom, righteousness, salvation, and approval from God. If the way we discipline doesn’t do those things, then we should really consider a new way.

Here are some great related articles:

• Spanking and Proverbs- https://greenegem.wordpress.com/2010/10/30/spanking-and-proverbs-part-2-interpretations/

• Divine scourging- http://www.freewebs.com/suffer-the-little-children/divinescourging.htm

• Shepherd’s manners and customs- http://www.bible-history.com/links.php?cat=39&sub=414&cat_name=Manners+%26+Customs&subcat_name=Shepherds

• A shepherd’s look at Psalm 23 by David Keller- http://www.antipas.org/commentaries/articles/shepherd_psa23/shepherd_07.html

• Tough love for rams- http://www.stonehavenfarm.com/page7/toughlove.html

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